Originally created as a "Kinky Question of the Day (KQotD)" concept, I decided to compile these questions as a guided journaling tool.
You can download the free journaling template PDF here!
- Is there a specific role play or scenario that intrigues you?
- What is your favorite part about your role in BDSM?
- What piece of advice would you give your past BDSM self?
- What is the biggest challenge you have encountered in your role in BDSM?
- What is a fetish or kink you have not tried yet, but would like to? Research it and take notes!
- What is a BDSM goal that you have? How can you work towards achieving this goal?
- What is a kink or fetish that scares you? Research it and take notes about how it can be safely practiced.
- What BDSM article have you read recently? Reflect on it and share your thoughts!
- What BDSM toy would you like to purchase? Create a budget plan to save up for it.
- Choose one of your limits or boundaries. How did you come to the decision about it?
- Think of the type of dynamic you have or would like to have. What drew you to that type of dynamic?
- What type of lingerie or clothing would you like your partner to wear?
- What safe words, signals, or system do you use? How did you decide on it?
- What fetish or kink have you read about that you're interested in learning about? Share your research!
- What are your thoughts on dirty talk? What phrases do you like to hear or say?
- What part of the kink culture confuses you still? Do some research and share your findings!
- How can you incorporate your favorite kinks and fetishes into a scene? Plan the scene!
- What is your favorite part of aftercare?
- Think of the pillar of Honesty. How can you be honest with yourself? With your partner? With your kink community?
- Research types and styles of collars. What kind of collar do you have or would like to have?
- What part of vetting do you feel often gets forgotten or glossed over? How can you bring more awareness to it?
- Think of the last kink you learned about. What is the history of that kink and how can it be practiced safely?
- Choose a piece of fictional BDSM media (book/movie/etc). How does it differ from actual BDSM? How does the kink community feel about it?
- Think of a kink you would like to try. How could the risks of exploring this kink cost you other life aspects? Is there a way to safely indulge in this kink?
- What safety plan do you have in place if kinky play goes wrong?
- What do you consider as green flags in your partner, or a potential partner?
- Think of the pillar of Trust. How can you trust yourself more? How can you build trust with your partner? With your kink community?
- Think of a kink you find weird. What preconceived notions do you have about it? Research it and evaluate if you still find it weird.
- How can a partner help pull you out of a bad headspace or drop? What tools might they need to do this?
- What is your love language? How can you incorporate your love language in your dynamic or future dynamic?
- What part of negotiations do you feel often gets forgotten or glossed over? How can you bring more awareness to it?
- Think of a time you experienced "drop" or might experience "drop." What can you do to help prevent it from occurring in the future?
- Find a local event (or as close to you as possible). What is the typical etiquette for that type of event? Share your research.
- How is your dominance or submission a gift?
- What is a dominant behavior that you find fulfilling (either displayed by you, or by someone else to you)? How?
- Who is your favorite kinky social media educator? What draws you to their content?
- Think of the pillar of Respect How can you respect yourself more? How can you build respect with your partner? With your kink community?
- What is a submissive behavior that you find fulfilling (either displayed by you, or by someone else to you)? How?
- Compare and contrast Expressed Consent and Implied Consent. How are they different and what are some challenges for each of them?
- What is a red flag that you feel is often overlooked during vetting? Why should it be considered more often?
- How does BDSM affect other vanilla aspects of your life and self identity?
- In your opinion, what is the biggest conflict between Old Guard and the New Guard BDSM?
- What are some honorifics you have heard? Which ones do you use or would like to use?
- What is the difference between a soft limit and a hard limit? Examine your limits and if they are soft or hard. What makes them fall one way or another?
- In what ways has BDSM and kink play allowed you freedom of expression?
- How would your perfect scene play out?
- Think of the pillar of Communication. How can you communicate with yourself more? How can you build communication with your partner? With your kink community?
- Compare and contrast RACK and PRICK. Which do you prefer and why? How can you incorporate each of them into your play or future play?
- Compare and contrast Boundaries and Limits. How do you set limits? How do you keep boundaries?
- What are ways you can keep yourself safe when meeting new kinksters?
- If you hosted a kinky workshop, what would it be about and how would it go?
- What is considered a "taboo kink?" Evaluate your own moral boundaries on how you decide what is too taboo, what is downright wrong, and what is a-okay for play.
- Who are your favorite kinky gear creators? What gear from these creators would you like to have?
- What platforms do you use for kink purposes or resources?
- Reflect on how you were introduced to kink. How has your view of BDSM changed since then?
- What are ways you can keep yourself safe when attending a kink event alone?
- How can you engage in conversations about kinks or fetishes that you don't want to partake in, without kink shaming others in the conversation?
- What are ways you can practice BDSM unconventionally?
- How can you create a space of emotional security for your partner or future partner?
- What is your favorite kink type of foreplay? What type of foreplay would you like to try?